Succumbing To The Darkness
by Darke-Faerie
Summary: Harry & Draco fall in love but it sadly doesnt last long...
1. Chapter 1

**A/N.** AU This is set from there 4th year on, but because Hogwarts is a senior only school (because this works for this story lol) this is technically there 1st year. Also Voldermort Never Existed. Harry's Parents Are Alive & Friendly With The Weasleys.

**Warnings:** *Self Harm* *Suicide* *Character Death* * Yaoi! (guyxguy)*

**Disclaimer**: I Don't On These Characters They Belong To Someone Else.

Chapter 1 / Year 1

It was their first year at Hogwarts the anxious first years had finally been sorted into their houses and the excitement of the day was beginning to wear off. Whilst they were tucking into the feast prepared by the house elves it was when two people noticed each other for the first time those two people go by the name of Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy. Harry had untidy short black hair and dazzling emerald eyes. He had been put into Gryffindor house along with Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley who he'd known since he was younger due to their parents being friends they had both met Hermione on the train who was exceptionally talented for a muggle. Draco had sleek white blond hair and stormy grey eyes. He had been put into Slytherin house along with his friends Crabbe and Goyle.

Staring across the great hall Draco caught Harry's eye he had never seen a pair of eyes so startlingly green he noticed the other boy staring back at him and immediately dropped his gaze. He tried to catch a look at the boy again but it was at that point that the prefects started rounding up the first years to take them up to their dormitories, oh why couldn't the green eyed boy be in Slytherin? On the way up to the dormitories Harry was looking around for the boy with the stormy grey eyes but he couldn't find him.

Over the next few weeks Harry and Draco tried to avoid each other which was hard to do seeing as Gryffindor and Slytherin shared many of their lessons. Neither of them were comfortable with what they felt for each other, seeing has neither of them had been attracted to a guy before.

As the year progressed neither Harry nor Draco could pluck up the courage to talk to each other settling instead to stare longingly at the object of their desire only to drop their gaze when the other one noticed what they were doing. Quidditch matches when there teams were playing each other were always the hardest though, since they were both seekers for their team. More than once they nearly missed the golden snitch because they we're too busy trying not to be caught staring at each other. Harry and Draco spent many sleepless nights in their dorms imaging what would happen if they plucked up the courage and went and introduced themselves to the other. To see if they felt the same way even if they didn't it would be better than not knowing.

On the morning of the last day of school before the summer holidays began Draco fed up of spending yet another night imagining what would happen if he actually talked to Harry, decide to pluck up the courage and talk to Harry. Draco waited till Harry had left the great hall after breakfast and followed him out. Harry moved faster than Draco expected and he was almost at the top of the marble staircase. "Harry!" shouted Draco running up the stairs to catch up to him. Harry stopped at the top of the stairs a blush slowly rising up his face. "Umm hi" stuttered Harry looking down at his feet. "Harry- I-I like you" blurted out Draco who immediately blushed. It took Harry a few moments to register what Draco had said "Yeah I – I like you to" they both smiled glad to have it off their chests. Harry flung his arms round Draco glad to finally know that the one he loved, loved him back. Students started coming out of the great hall and they immediately broke apart Draco rummaged around in his robes and pulled out a tattered piece of parchment

"Draco could I-" Draco stopped Harry mid-sentence and handed him the piece of parchment. "Harry, write to me in the holidays I want to know everything about you" Draco said emphasising the word everything. Harry nodded

"Yes I want to know about you as well" he smiled pocketed the address and headed up to the Gryffindor common room.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2/ Year 2

It was the first day of term and Harry was eager to get on the train to finally see the one who been in his thoughts all summer. His parents had noticed his nervousness but they just put it down to Harry's new appearance. "Bye See you at Christmas" Harry said waving at his parents from the carriage window. Checking his watch he had a few hours left till he had promised to meet up with Draco so he turned to face his friends, who had just walked into the carriage "So how was your holidays?" he asked "Great" answered Hermione and Ron at the same time they laughed then Hermione launched into a tale about her family vacation to France. Then when she finished Harry seized his chance excusing himself to go to the bathroom he went in search of Draco. It didn't take him long letting himself into the compartment Harry smiled at him. "Wow you weren't lying when you said you were going emo" Draco greeted him taking in Harry's faded black skinny jeans, T-shirt declaring the name of a band no one had heard of till his gaze settled on Harry's heavily kohl rimmed eyes, where one of the emerald orbs was hidden behind the floppy, black fringe. Harry was silent for a moment whilst he took in Draco's appearance he had not changed much over the holidays his hair a bit longer perhaps. Harry looked up Draco was staring into his eyes so Harry leant forward and did what he had been wanting to do since first laying his eyes on Draco he kissed him. Draco who had not been expecting this tripped over and fell backwards on to the seat pulling Harry with him. Sometime later they noticed that the lamps had turned on meaning that the train would soon be pulling up to Hogwarts. Sighing Harry got up and made his way to the door just before he reached the door Draco found his voice "Harry, do you know where the room of requirement is?"

"No"

"Well it's on the third floor you walk past the wall three times thinking what kind of room you want. Meet me there next Monday at seven I'll be looking forward to what room you think of" instructed Draco.

"'Kay see you then" said Harry and hurried back to his compartment.

Sliding open the door he was greeted by a shrill Hermione "Where have you been?"

"I got stuck in a Slytherin compartment they only just let me out." He explained, well he had been with a Slytherin so it wasn't far from the truth.

Harry walked into the great hall the following morning to find everyone starting at him and whispering. He panicked they hadn't found out about him and Draco had they? Passing the Ravenclaw table he caught snippets of conversation. "He looks like a girl with all that makeup" , "who calls that fashion?" he breathed a sigh of relief at least no one knew about him and Draco – yet. Sitting down beside Hermione and Ron he ate his breakfast. The whispers followed him around all week but Harry ignored them focusing on his upcoming meeting with Draco. Things came to a head on the night he was supposed to meet Draco he walked into the great hall for dinner one of the Slytherin shouted at across the room "Oi Potter, My sister asked if she could have her make up back!" everyone in the great hall burst out laughing cheeks burning Harry made his way to the Gryffindor table but the taunting didn't stop there the Slytherin kept up a loud commentary on Harry's appearance all the way through dinner. Harry played with his food all through dinner till he couldn't take it anymore the week of being ridiculed and now the taunting had got to him, making sure no one saw he slipped his knife in his bag. Excusing himself he left the great hall before the Slytherin had the pleasure of seeing that he'd made Harry cry. Running into the boy's bathroom Harry locked himself in a cubicle he rummaged through his bag till he found the knife he had in his bag taking a deep breath Harry drew it across his arm like he'd seen the muggle teens do. He instantly felt better. Grabbing some tissue he held it to the wound till the bleeding stopped, hearing someone enter the bathroom he quickly cleaned the knife and flushed the bloody tissues down the toilets. Hearing the bathroom door click shut again Harry knew it was safe to leave the cubicle. He made his way up to Gryffindor common room to wait out the hours till his date with Draco.

On his third time past the wall a door appeared for Harry opening it he found Draco waiting for him grabbing Harry's hand he dragged the boy in to the room pressing him against the wall Draco started kissing Harry. A while later Draco was sat on the floor with Harry's head in his lap, "I never mentioned how hot you look as an emo did I?" Draco said kissing his boyfriend's head. "Just ignore what they're saying there just jealous that they don't look as good in make up as you." He smiled. Harry blushed, "We'd better get going" Draco said sadly, neither of them wanted to leave this room but they did have lessons the next day. Making plans to meet up again in a few weeks Draco and Harry parted ways.

It carried on like this for most of the school year Harry and Draco meeting every few weeks and Harry cutting himself to cope with the bullying. When they met up they never went further than a kiss until Draco started wanting to do more. It was the last time they we're going to see each other before the summer holidays started. They met up in the room of requirement like normal and started making out, Draco slid his hands down Harry's body until he reached the edge of Harry's long sleeved t-shirt tugging on he tried taking it off Harry. "No Draco" Harry said stepping back from his boyfriend, Draco had a hurt look on his face he couldn't figure out why his gorgeous boyfriend didn't want to be seen half naked. "Why not?" asked Draco.

" I, I just don't want to go that far yet" truthfully he didn't want Draco to find out about his secret, he'd told Draco that the bullies didn't get to him but the jagged red lines up his arms and down his legs told a different story. "I promise after the holidays I'll be ready" he reassured Draco who was sat on the floor too caught up in the rejection from Harry to really hear what he was saying. Seeing that Draco wanted to be alone Harry made his excuses "Bye Draco, see you after the holidays" and left the room.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3/ Year 3

Harry wasn't look forward to going back to Hogwarts to start his third year he hadn't heard off Draco all summer and those who had been taunting him all year had found out his address and had been sending him howlers and threatening letters all summer. When he got on the train he thankfully got a compartment to himself. About halfway to Hogwarts Harry heard the door to his compartment open he looked up and saw Ron's girlfriend Lavender Brown a fellow 6th year Gryffindor who was known for gossiping too much. Seeing Harry there an evil smile spread across her face, "Oh sorry didn't see you there" she said and left the compartment. Thinking nothing of it Harry went back to starting out the window.

It had been a few months since Harry had come back to Hogwarts he was still being taunted and some Slytherin's had taken to jinxing him in the corridors. He hadn't seen Draco since the last day of term. He couldn't cope with this anymore he had been self harming more and one more bad thing would just push him over the edge. He walked into the Great Hall one morning and everybody stopped talking walking to the Gryffindor table he looked over at the Slytherin table reflexively and saw that Draco had been crying he wondered why? Whispers followed him around all day he caught snippets of conversation "How could he have" , " His best friend" "Yeah but with her?" none of it made sense of it to Harry but he had a strange feeling in the pit of his stomach that he would find out soon. After hastily eating his dinner Harry escaped to the Gryffindor common room. Walking into the common room Harry found Ron waiting for him "HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME HARRY?" asked Ron

"Do what?" asked Harry frustrated.

" HAVE SEX WITH LAVENDER YOU KNOW SHE'S MY GIRLFRIEND AND ON THE TRAIN AS WELL HARRY YOU'VE HAD MONTH'S TO TELL ME AND I FIND OUT OFF LOOPY LUNA LOVEGOD?"

"Ron I'd never do that to you, you should know that and anyway why didn't Lavender tell you she is supposed to be your girlfriend? "

" DON'T YOU DARE BLAME THIS ON LAVENDER!"

"But Ron I'm telling the truth I've never laid a hand on Lavender"

"JUST FUCK OFF HARRY I NEVER WANT TO SPEAK TO YOU AGAIN!" with that Ron stormed out of the common room. Not believing what had just happened Harry went upstairs to his room he needed to get rid of the bad emotions in his head Harry reached into his trunk for the knife he keep in there. Taking off his robes he found an unmarked spot on his arm (a job which was getting harder every time.) drawing the knife over the bare skin he instantly felt better, mopping up the blood he applied a bandage and cried himself to sleep not wanting to go back down and face the looks and whispered conversations about him from his fellow Gryffindor's.

The next week was pure torture for Harry none of his friends talked to him and the bullying got worse by the end of the week he was ending up in the hospital wing about three times a day due to people jinxing and cursing him in the corridors. By the Sunday he decided he couldn't take it anymore, he had no friends to speak of (unless he counted his knife which was now becoming his constant companion) and the only person he would ever loved hadn't spoke to him in months. He decided the only way out of this hell for him would be to kill himself, the emo muggle's he bothered with in the summer had told him it was easy a few deep cuts on each wrist and that was it he could sink away into darkness. Not wanting to die and not let Draco know his true feelings for him Harry slipped a note into Draco's pocket when he left the Great Hall at dinner time. It said :

_Dear Draco _

_I can't take this life anymore I'm going to kill myself tonight and there's nothing anyone can do to make me change my mind. But before I do I need to get a few things straight I have always loved you ever since I first laid eyes on you in the great hall on the first day and if circumstances were different I would want to spend my whole life with you. Last summer I wouldn't let you see me naked because I was ashamed of the scares that line my arms and now my legs. I was depressed but was too scared to ask for help I thought people would have thought that to 'Emo' of me. I never slept with Lavender she did come into my compartment on the train but left straight away I would never go off with someone else and hurt you in that way. You are the only one I've told about what I'm doing, I will kill myself in the prefects bathroom so if anyone asks were I am point them there. I'm so sorry about this. _

_I love you_

_Harry _

_Xxx _

Waiting until his dorm mates were asleep Harry slipped on his invisibility cloak grabbed his knife and left his dorm room for the last time. Arriving at the prefects bathroom he muttered the password (he'd overheard Percy telling a fellow prefect what it was a few days ago) stepping into the room he looked around if he hadn't been gone there to kill himself he may have been impressed by the grandness of the room but he had other things on his mind. Reaching into his pocket he pulled out the knife he had been using to cut himself with for the last year, taking a deep breath he drew it across his right wrist blood welled up instantly he then did the same to his left wrist. He stood there with blood dripping from his wrist waiting for the blackness to come but it didn't. Decide he couldn't wait for the cuts on his wrist to kill him he filled up the bath with intentions of drowning himself he didn't care whether the water was hot or cold has long has he didn't have to suffer this life any more taking off his blood soaked robes Harry jumped in the now full bath. Has he finally sinked in to the blackness he had been longing for Draco burst through the door "Harry! No don't do it!" he reached the bath set in the middle of the floor he saw the naked body of his boyfriend floating in the bath the blood from the cuts on his wrist turning the water a strange pinky - red colour. How he had longed to see Harry naked but not like this, not when he looked this lifeless. Reaching in to grab Harry's arms he pulled him out of the bath wrapping his cloak around him. Draco felt the pulse on Harry's neck to see if he was still alive but Draco was too late Harry had succumbed to the darkness. Holding Harry's lifeless corpse tight to his body Draco reached for the blood stained knife that Harry had taken his life with. Draco knew he could never live without the love of his life so he would be with Harry in death instead. Taking a deep breath Draco drew the blood stained blade across his wrists then he too succumbed to the darkness.


End file.
